Dr. Edith Eger
Benefitting the USC Shoah Foundation
With so many losing so much during the pandemic, how should we think about the nature of suffering? Holocaust survivor and psychologist Dr. Edith Eger has some powerful words to offer us. Her message? Concentrate not on what you lost, but what you still have. In this inspiring conversation, Dr. Edie reveals her greatest lessons on loss, rejection, the power of choice, finding strength in suffering, ways to think about guilt, and why the word “can’t” isn’t in her vocabulary.
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In this episode, we talk about:
Dr. Edith’s experience while at Auschwitz.
The role her faith played during her time there.
How she turned her pain into her purpose.
Discovering her inner strength.
The foundation of her theory as a psychologist.
Wise Words
I ask the students not to allow anyone to define you because God doesn't make junk.
They'll never, ever be another you no one can replace you.
When a woman tells me, I need to find the man Edi. I say, just change your self-talk. If you change your thinking, you can change your life.
That suffering made me stronger. That is really what I know that I want to tell you, to concentrate on not what you lost, but what you still have, which you and the COVID is time out. Time out to read and redecide not to go back, but to have a new beginning.
I'm coming to you as a midwife and you're pregnant, and you're going to give birth to the you that was meant to be. What you're going to hold on to and what are you willing? It's a very good word, willing to be willing to change and let go of the need for other people's approval of you.
Rejection is just an English word that people make up to express a feeling when you don't get what you want.
The worst condition I tell you, bring out the best in us. I found love,and I asked me, where was God in Aushwitz, and my answer is God was with me and guided me to turn hate to pity. I began to pray. I began to really look at the guards, not with hatred, but with pity that they were brainwashed to hate me. That they are the prisoners, not me.
They could throw me in a gas chamber any minute, four o'clock in the morning as we stood there, we didn't know what's going to happen next. When we took a shower, we didn't know whether water or gas was going to come out. The only thing I could control is my attitude, the way I looked at the guards. Actually, if I would've died, I would've been found praying for the guards.
Tomorrow was really, truly the best thing I had in Auschwitz. Tomorrow became my friend that somehow together we are going to make it. This is just temporary and I can survive it and become stronger from suffering.
Most of all, I really tell the children in school, what my mom told me in the train. She said, we don't know where we are going. We don't know what's going to happen, honey. Just remember no one can take away from you, what you put in your mind. I ask the students to check out a movie called karate kid, because the best power is the brain power and not to mess with their brain and not to smoke pot as a teenager. I do do a little preaching too, at my age I can afford that.
I get rid of guilt and I get rid of worry. Guilt is in the past, and I cannot change the past. I hope to learn from it and go through that experience. But I don't get stuck in that. I don't live in Auschwitz. I call it my cherished wound.
You cannot heal what you don't feel. Don't try to understand things. That word belongs somewhere in the university, somewhere in a classroom. I don't try to understand things. I like to live life to the fullest working, loving and playing.
That's how it happened. On May 4th, 1945 when God has saved me to be here with you today, to teach people to be a good person to you, and be a good person to you because self love is beautiful.
I think if you have your secret, it's better to share it because what comes out of your body doesn't make you ill. What stays in there does. The biggest concentration camp is in your own mind. The key is in your pocket.
Suffering is feelings and without feelings, we just go through the motions in life.
I gave myself permission to give up the need for other people's approval of me that I reclaim my true self. Forgiveness is a gift that I give to myself, because if I would live with hate and seek revenge, I still would be a prisoner. I refuse to be a victim. It's not who I am. It's not my identity. It's what was done to me. That's a big difference. I'm free to live as long as I can.
Revenge only gives you a very temporary satisfaction. But the forgiveness that I speak about has given me the greatest hope and the greatest freedom.
Links
Website: www.dreditheger.com
Facebook: Dr. Edith Eger
Instagram: @dr.editheger
Books: THE GIFT: 12 Lessons to Save Your Life , THE CHOICE: Embrace the Possible
Charity Donation: USC Shoah Foundation